There are nights I can't sleep and I lie awake on my back. Staring, hoping I don't see some long haired kakak appearing from the corner of my black ceiling. Or especially when I forget to close the wardrobe door and I'll stare at the topmost corner, making sure there's no one there... (Don't ask, I've had that phobia since watching Ju-On, shuddup.)


But tonight I was thinking about how drastically my life changed. How things do happen for a reason. And that karma exists.


I remember the days I'd torture myself and cry my brains out to sleep just by reading the ex's blog posts. And then I'd have to call Heather or JX, who'd then make me feel better every single time. (But I still do it over and over and over again hahaha.) One thing JX said stuck to me though.. He told me to imagine myself in 10 years, how likely would it be that I'm still hung up and crying over him? HARDLY SO.


So there, I held on to the belief that some day I would be happy again. And it took me losing (or at least it feels like it) a best friend to realise that I should stop wasting my time with someone who doesn't love me anymore and cherish those who actually cared about me.


And here I am, happy at last. I went through the most pathetic, most traumatic, darkest, saddest moments of my life (so far). But I'm glad to say, I FUCKIN' MADE IT. :D And I'm happy.


So thank you for those who held on for me. The Superheroes, the Toncakmates, the Champions, the kawan kawan sekolah, and of course Heather and JX, I love you all. I guess that's why my friends are so much more important to me right now. After all, they were the ones who stayed. (:


God knows where I'd be right now if not for you people. Heee. *Bursts in rainbows of love like a Carebear* Goodnight.


Ciao-


(Note to future self: If all else fails, you will always have awesome hair Yan. :D)

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