A huge ass number of people come up to me and will ask how the hell I managed to fuck up school that bad. And I prefer to just brush it off. I don't particularly like talking about it cos I know I messed up big time but that doesn't mean I regret anything I've done.


Whatever I did, it's because I wanted to. I flunked and skipped school happily and served me right for getting into a huge ass amount of trouble for it. Good. So it woke me up. It's something no one can teach me. Sometimes it's better to learn things the hard way.


I appreciate all the support I get from left right and center, I have the awesomest friends and I know so. But just so you know, I will never regret whatever I've done. That's just not how I roll man. Cos I know I'm changed for the better now. :)


And besides, the current Year Twos are waaaay better than some~ people I know in my batch. Haha. Just sayin'. Good night.


Ciao~
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If there was ever a time that I thought I could just walk away unscathed, then that time is over. I cannot be happy without you now. Every day I fall harder. Every thing is starting to make more sense and gaining more purpose.

I'm trying my best to change. And I know you will support me no matter where I'm at. Just the thought of disappointing you is my motivation to do better, to be a better person. If not for you, I don't know how I'd even get up in the morning. And quite literally too hehe.

Because you woke me up and gave me the life that I have now,



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Loads of ups and downs. Back in school. But in just two weeks I fucked up so many things. Got depressed a whole lot and an absent (physically) boyfriend. But omg I love him madly cos he just seems to make everything a whole lot better.


And my girls... I love you people. I can't wait til next week when you two minahs are back from partying nabehs hahaha. School ain't the same without you guys. Teaching Mad random Malay words is sumpah funny. Hahahaha.


My life has been going great. Seriously trying to balance out my life. Been doing pretty well. If not for him pushing me, God knows where I'll be right now.. Probably trying to look for a job right now.. O.O


I know you can't always be there for me but I know you do your best. Thank you sayang. :) So don't get charged or do stupid things or I will seriously whack you sia. Hahaha.


These days I black out the moment I get home so I'm too tired to be here. Haha. Love you all. CIAO~
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CRAZIEST WEEK EVER. FULLSTOP. PERIOD.


Had the best times getting all dressed up for Halloween Horrors. Tiring as fucks. Had a few proposals (since I'm Cinderella and shit) and generally zoning out a lot because when I'm in character as a bimbo I just go ZZZZZZZZZZ.


Then came the rashes. Then came the face swells. Hahahaha this girl is really one kind I tell you. Thank God I'm not allergic to any food (not that I know of anyways) or it'll really be a bitch. I look horrendous. Macam Rocky lah, easy to say.


I got an injection on my ass, THAT'S A FIRST MAN. Which hurt like a bitch and now I'm poofing up more than ever. Can't wait to take the meds again. It seems to be working. I hope I'm not fucking allergic to it thou. Major FML if I was.


Tired.


AND I AM TRYING TO POST THE PHOTOS OKAY. Only that FB is being sucha bitch! Hmph. Ciao baby ciao~


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Suddenly, I don't know if this is what I want anymore. I'm so fucked.




I can't lie. I can't even list reasons why I want it back. Because I don't. I don't want this anymore. I can't live my life for others. This may be my future but whatever I've gone through so far, I hated it.


I hate that I'm so moody about this that everyone becomes a target of my frustration. I need to make a decision fast. I can't go on with this any longer. To anyone who might potentially be disappointed, sad, or angry at me, I'm sorry. I hope you understand and stand by whatever decisions I'm about to make.

Oh wells. There has to be un-awesome days too right..

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I had the awesomest jalan raye yesterday with the Toncakmates. It was the most epic and seriously most fun one so far even though tiring as fuck because I was the last one home after sending everyone back to their homes. Heheh.


Stay tuned for the photos. Alot of bloody funny ones which is mostly made up of Azip and I cos he holds the camera and I will always carik kesempatan to camwhore of course.... Heheheh. Should post up a special album of blooper shots cos that's how a lot there is in it.. Haha.


Selamat Hari Raye to all my friends. Salam maaf zahir batin to all, a hug for the boo, BUT A FIST BUMP FOR B, WOOOOOOOP! Cos we're cool like that. Hahahah.


I LOVE YOU ALL MADLY! :D


And today my Medic came baccccccccccccck! From bloody Brunei. He got me a prez toooooo~ Heheheh. Baby you da best! Sorted things out between us and now Indiana Jones and I have some matters to take care of. Hahaha.


His philosophical quote of the day, "Love is not about ungkit ungkit sayang..." HAHAHAHHA. Whatever eh. I win. You don't talk cock here. :)


Good night all. Tough day tomorrow. Tough Tuesday it is. Medic wants me to meet his mum. Wtf. Will try to weasel my way out of this........ Hahahaha. CIAO~
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My somewhat new hair, which isn't so black anymore. :D It was horrendous when it was black I tell you hahaha. Mad went to bleach the botak areas then it started to ITCH LIKE A BITCH. Cos her mix of dye had bleach in it waaaaaahhh.. Itchy like crazy sia. And all she could do was laugh hahahah. And also thanks Quirk!


I didn't sleep the night before so I was tired as fuckkkks. And worse, I was supposed to be at Queenie's at 10. But I was too nervous to sleep just in case I overslept. Wtf. Life of a nocturnal.


Had a bad Friday for once though. But Medic finally got back from the jungles, with the monkeys he said. And he's gonna be home on Monday and uh... Hmmm. I don't really know how I feel about it. Weird I guess. Haha.


I didn't get good sleep last night either. Nightmares were really bad. :( But today I realised who my friends were. And they are awesome. :) I love you all so much.


And that's it really. Tired and tomorrow jalan raye! :D Prove to Ib that actually I'm not so helpless like our "jalan raye" that time. Hahahahha. That was totally sedih man. Haha.


Ok stay off drugs. Behave. Sleep well! CIAO~
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